Underwater Lies the Mind
by H1d4nSAN
Summary: Hatake Kakashi is forcefully displaced during a vital moment in his life. Desperately he clings on the visage of hope that he'll find a way home. Kakashi must find a way to cope with being thrust into a world not his own. His path brings him to the Northernmost province of Tamriel, Skyrim. Where he finds himself in the company of a stubborn nord woman. [Friendship Eventual Romance]
1. Chapter 1: Whiterun

_**A/N: I just want to give a special thanks to my beta Slizzah. This would not be possible without him. He really helped me with the first two chapters of this story. I recommend checking out his work particularly Naruto the Scarecrow. **_

_**Anyway I hope you all enjoy! This is primarily a Kakashi centric fic. There are not many Kakashi centric crossovers so I've wanted to do this for sometime. I already have the next chapter ready and it will be released soon. I've been working on this fic for a very long time. I've re-read and polished this chapter many times. I have an established plot for where this story is going. This is truly a labor of passion and I hope you enjoy it as much as I have.**_

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There was an ache in his head so sharp his skull felt like it was being crushed with an invisible pressure. He groaned before flitting an eye open hesitantly to find the sun hitting his face. The world felt like it was spinning so fast that getting up was an act of defiance against the world. Then it hit his aching body, the true reason for him being awoken so abruptly despite his wishes to remain dormant was his need to relieve his bladder. He stifled a few more groans as he gently lifted his own body off the spinning ground. The man looked into a stream coming out of the city walls and was greeted with the unpleasant sight of himself disheveled and almost foreign. The silverette leaned against the rough cold stone wall and relieved himself, he felt pure bliss for the few seconds.

Then it hit him like a brick against his already aching head,_ I really don't belong here_. He took a few jagged breaths of the cold air and looked at the scenery around him.

It was morning and people were barely getting out of their homes to tend to their farms, chickens clucking noisily and cows mooing in the distance. Pastures of wheat were overshadowed by tall mountains. Cold air penetrated his bare pale skin and made his bones shiver. He allowed himself to unceremoniously collapse back to the ground where he laid on golden dying grass. He pulled a deer hide over himself and bottles came loose from underneath the hide making clanging noises. He tried to stifle the chattering of his teeth and began to channel chakra around his body to warm himself. A man he vaguely recognized from the village walked up to him, with something like pity in his eyes.

"Hey there stranger, I noticed you from last night at the tavern. The guards said you helped slay a dragon? You were gone for a few months after that. You know I think the Jarl never got to say his thanks before you left… Look I don't know you or the things you're trying to forget," The blonde than motioned to the empty bottles of mead surrounding the silverette. "But I wanted to say thank you, for protecting our home…I didn't get to say so last night."

There was something like a pregnant pause between the two. The blonde seemed to be hesitating with something while the silverette didn't much move but to glance around while making no attempt to get up. The silverette than cleared his throat that felt dry and horse before speaking up," Can I help you?"

The blonde sort of smirked and softly chuckled," I think that's the question I should be asking you."

The silverette rolled onto his back before sitting up slowly, the only thing clothing his torso the deer hide draped on his shoulders. "Can you please show me where I can get water?"

The blonde nodded and helped the stranger up insisting on helping him walk inside the village walls. "You know stranger I don't think I ever caught your name."

"Kakashi Hatake, this town it's Whiterun, right?"

"Kakashi Hatake, huh? Unusual name, pardon me for saying so. But yes, this is Whiterun. By the way I'm Jon Battle-Born," Jon replied. He led Kakashi over to the well and helped draw him a pail of water. Kakashi chugged a good amount down satisfying his parched throat. He wiped his mouth and looked over the town with Jon still hovering over him.

"Thanks Jon, I don't need anything else from here. You say the Jarl has been waiting for me?"

"Aye, that'd be correct. City guard won't stop talking about it, saying the man who killed that dragon months ago never claimed his reward. They want to make you a Thane you know? Offer you land to purchase. Figured you need it seeing the state I found you in this morning, not that it's any of my business."

Kakashi nodded slowly in response and tenderly picked himself off the stone ground with the help of the well he was leaning on. "Thanks Jon, but you're right it isn't any of your business. If you'd pardon me, I need to collect my things before speaking to the Jarl."

Jon just shrugged and went back to leaning in his spot in the shop court. Kakashi walked slowly back to his mess and gathered a few things he'd hidden in the tall grass. Kakashi felt exhaustion begging him to sleep another day off. He forced himself to gather his things but couldn't bring himself to pick up the empty bottles of mead littering the grass. He splashed his bare face with water before gently dressing himself in garb he'd picked up. Strapping leather to his arms and shoulders he finished his look by pulling up a mask over his nose and adjusting a leather eye patch.

Kakashi had been slow to dress and slow to move, how did he let himself fall into this sort of disarray? He wanted to be mad at himself but felt too hollow to really make it stick. His logic told him allowing himself to get here was something he should be ashamed about, but he just couldn't bring himself to care anymore. He sighed to himself looking down at the bottles and even kicked one._ Here we are another day and nowhere closer to home, _Kakashi thought to himself. Kakashi's heart panged when he thought back to how he got here. He'd do anything to get home.

Kakashi got himself together and made an attempt to walk into town. He felt sicker than he'd ever felt in his years in hospitals, but he still managed to walk up the tall steps leading to Dragonsreach keep.

It turned out that the Jarl had indeed been waiting eagerly for his return. It was as Jon spoke they made him a Thane, whatever that meant, and offered land for his purchase. Kakashi gave his thanks and made his way out of the hall. He needed to kill a few things before he had the coin to purchase the land they offered to him. That's when Kakashi was stopped by a woman hanging in the doorway.

"E-excuse me, the Jarl has appointed me to be your housecarl. It's an honor to serve you."

Kakashi noted the woman wasn't bad to look at. Something tomboyish came off about her, the way she carried herself reminded Kakashi of a certain pinkette back home. She seemed to be thrown off by the book he was reading, her reason for blushing and stammering. Kakashi snapped the book close and put it in a pouch on his belt. He honestly didn't feel like talking to anyone, but he couldn't bring himself to be rude enough to brush her off. Something about her grabbed his attention, as did her offer. "Hmmm… Housecarl, huh? What do you do exactly?"

The raventte cleared her throat as if to regain composure before speaking, "As my Thane, I'm sworn to your service. I'll guard you and all you own with my life."

Kakashi pondered this for a moment, "Okay I'll bite," he sighed," What is a Thane? Do I have to do stuff or have some sort of duty?"

"No, The Jarl has recognized you as a person of great importance in the hold, a hero. The title of Thane is an honor, a gift for your service. Guards will know to look the other way, if you let them know who you are," announced the housecarl with a positive hum.

"If I'm a hero why do I want guards to look the other way? Wouldn't that make me a common criminal?" Kakashi deadpanned.

"Well, I thought- well you see- "Kakashi put a hand up to halt the conversation and the housecarl quieted instantly.

"Okay housecarl, would you like to get a bite to eat? Personally I'm famished; maybe we can find a quiet place away from prying ears and loose lips." Kakashi then eyed an elderly maid who scoffed at what he was implying and stormed off. "It'll be my treat," he said with an eye crinkle he used in his famous smiles.

"Did you have a place in mind my Thane?"

"I'm not very familiar where we can go to such a place," Kakashi lied smoothly, he was actually very acutely aware of where they could go. "I'll leave it up to you."

The raven haired women quietly led Kakashi to the Drunken Huntsman and asked the owner for a more private place in the tavern. The jonin paid for the room and both were led to a small back room with two wooden chairs and a table. Kakashi got grilled salmon, leeks and a bottle of mead. It was a little early to start drinking again but it didn't seem like folks here cared when you drank mead. The housecarl got what was likely cheapest option of a mysterious meat pie and water. Kakashi noted it was very thoughtful for her to get something cheap on his dollar, he wondered if she did it on purpose. Naruto could have learned a thing or two from this woman.

"So, Lydia, then? I'm Kakashi, it's nice to meet you. The reason why I wanted a more private place is because I wanted to ask," Kakashi sat up mask still firmly in place and arms crossed. "You being my housecarl, does that make you my slave?"

"N-no! My Thane-" Kakashi flinched and interrupted her.

"Please don't call me your Thane. I'm not you're anything and the name is Kakashi. Also, please keep your voice down my head isn't feeling that well right now."

"Sorry, My Tha- Kakashi… I'm not you're slave, It's my highest honor to serve you and to protect you and all that you own."

"So do you get compensation for serving me?"

"Well, not monetary beyond what you allow me."

"Doesn't that make you a slave?"

"No sir, there are things that slaves do that I don't. It's also honorary to serve you in the way that I do especially since you are an important person known throughout the hold."

"Did you even choose to serve me? Do you even know who I am?"

"No sir, my greatest apologies for not yet being current on your accomplishments which I can assume are many. You have earned the trust and admiration of the Jarl; I trust his judgment in assigning me to you."

"Lydia did you choose this lifestyle? Or were you forced into it."

"We-Well I… This was the life my father wanted for me. It's an honorary life and it's the best one I could have hoped for."

"What if I don't want you to serve me? What happens to you?"

"I… go back to the hall, Dragonsreach and wait for you to call upon my service."

"What if I want to set you free?" There was a long tense pause between the two. Kakashi hadn't even touched his food yet as Lydia refused to look in his eyes. She seemed to be in deep thought. Finally she looked up into his eyes with eye brows knitting in what looked to be frustration.

"I'm sworn to serve you my Thane." Kakashi sighed looked away and began thinking to himself. _This isn't what I asked for. How am I going to get home if I'm responsible for this woman's fate? She's not going to leave my side even if I abandon her. Are you so heartless you'd let her spend forever waiting at some glorified castle hall for you? What if they think I'm dead what happens to her then? She goes on being the servant of some other likely arrogant asshole. Should I just leave her then? She really isn't my problem, right? I could use some help to get home, someone who knows this world. _He tapped his foot and looked back at her noting something of determination being formed in her eyes.

"Lydia, I'm not your Thane," Kakashi let out a deep sigh. "I don't even belong here… I tell you what, it doesn't seem like I get a say in our arrangement, so how's about we drop the honor bullshit and this whole serving thing and just agree we're companions for now. If you really have any hopes to 'protect me' then I have some teaching to give you that'll benefit us both. Any jobs I pick up for us to do we will split pay whether you like it or not. When the time finally comes and I make it home then it means you get to inherit all I own, whether you like it or not."

Kakashi observed the women look confused for a moment and looked as if she was thinking about something.

"Kakashi, my Thane, your compensation is not required for my service. Although if you truly insist I have to say I am truly honored at your charity." Kakashi felt like sighing but shrugged, this was good enough he supposed. Her determination was something to be admired, if not annoying. In some way her insistence to call him Thane made him think about Naruto and Sakura's insistence to call him sensei. It made him nostalgic a bit. His itch to find a way home began to surface again and he pushed it down.

The jonin had managed during their conversation to eat his food stealthily all without giving away his unmasked appearance. He could tell Lydia was perplexed when she looked up and noticed all the food was gone, mask still firmly in place. He loved playing this game with his dear old students and he was having some mild fun playing it with his newest forced companion. He pulled out his book and let Lydia finish her food silently. She made a face when he started reading the obviously suggestive book. Another game he used to love to play, alas he didn't quite enjoy this book like he did his Make Out Paradise books. This book was a smaller almost journal version of an apparently popular tome. It was about a handsome man and his maid, who was a lizard woman. Kakashi didn't know how to feel about that last detail but would pretend she wasn't a lizard as he read on. When Lydia finally finished her food, Kakashi snapped his book shut.

"Well Lydia this has been fun but I need to scratch a couple coins together to get us a decent house to stay at. Do you mind waiting here while I do some work?"

"I can help you now," Lydia insisted. Kakashi mulled over the thought of having her tag along untrained. Sure he could protect her from just about anything that was on the road, but the thought of babysitting a civilian gave him pause always. Although he was fairly certain ninja just didn't exist in this world, and it was possible that he was the most dangerous thing walking this world. Kakashi looked over the ravenette, he was sure that she was fairly capable at holding her own against mediocre bandits.

"I don't mean to offend but are there some merits that make you housecarl? I'm not from around here so I don't know your culture."

"I am a skilled shield maiden. I've been noted for my skills in sword handling since I was a teen and have even squared off my peers in arena matches. I am daughter of Fjoek the Raven; he was noted as a brave warrior in the Jarl's court. I've been trained to fight with the Jarl's men and he has personally branded me as worthy as a warrior as he helped my training to where it is now. He sees me fit to be housecarl to nobles he is friends with. Surely that's plenty of merit." Lydia said, her face somewhat stern.

"I guess that's good enough." Kakashi sighed and pushed his chair back. None of the merits Lydia gave to Kakashi really meant anything to him but something was better than nothing. He noticed something of an indignant expression being formed on the ravenette but ignored it as he went back to the counter. He ordered five more bottles of Honningbrew mead and a couple Black Briar reserves. He led the housecarl out of town and even began to drink one of the bottles he had acquired. Kakashi headed to a nearby bandit camp he was asked to clear out for some coin, a man in town also asked him to retrieve a sword here as well. It was a cave called Redoran's Retreat.

"Look a cave, I wonder what's inside." Lydia remarked.

"Well hopefully the sword a guy asked me to retrieve and some bandits. Be ready," Kakashi replied leading the way in. He drew a throwing dagger he had managed to keep on him from his world. Kakashi noted Lydia seemed fascinated with it and was trying to get a good view of it. "It's just a dagger."

"I've never seen one look so… shiny? Like polished but perfectly, most the ones I've seen are jagged; at least compared to that one. You make it? If so you must be a master craftsman."

"Nope, I didn't make it. It comes from my home. It's one of my last ones; I have five more of these. The rest of them I lost at Helgan. I guess I am going to have to learn how to make more eventually." Kakashi's attention snapped when he heard a dog bark. Kakashi got low to the ground and signaled Lydia to do the same. She complied hesitantly as stealth wasn't her first choice in combat. Kakashi motioned to the ravenette to stay still and he made quick work of the guy the dog was with. Kakashi was about to approach the dog but Lydia had already slain the poor creature. She drew her sword out of the animal and waited for motion from Kakashi to move on.

"I told you to stay still," Kakashi said with mild irritation. He was looking down at the dog and not anywhere at his companion.

"I did but it attacked me, I killed it."

"I can see that…" The silverette drew out a sigh as the silence between them became thick. He really wanted to spare the dog but it was no point any longer. "Shame… I guess it's no use crying over spilled milk."

Kakashi plunged his dagger in the poor dog and got its ribs. These people had an appetite for dog ribs and they fetched some coin. Why anyone would think a dog was a suitable meal was beyond him, dogs were companions not meals. He picked off the dead guy's armor and collected all his belonging. Kakashi haphazardly strapped the swords and armor to his back and made quick work of the chest in the cave. He collected anything of value, anything worth more than the dog ribs he collected.

Kakashi led Lydia further into the cave. _'Time to show her why I don't need protection.' _He formed several hand signs and his Lightning Blade flared to life. Using his superior speed, Kakashi entered a dimly lit room. Two bandits looked up at the sudden entrance. Before they could do anything else, Kakashi had dealt with them. Turning back to the entrance, Kakashi saw Lydia. She looked surprised but didn't say anything. Shaking his hand to try and get rid of the blood, Kakashi walked back towards Lydia.

"Like my trick?"

"I don't think I've seen a spell like that but then again I don't know many magic spells."

"It's not really a spell." Kakashi quickly turned away from the housecarl and began stripping the room of its valuables. He could easily carry most of everything in the room but wanted to put his boundaries with his forced companion to the test. Kakashi held a heavy two handed sword out for her. "Could you carry this for me?"

"I'm sworn to carry your burdens," Lydia quipped.

"Really? What else are you sworn to? You know as far as services go."

"I already told you, protect you and all you own."

"So protecting includes as you put it," Kakashi got his quoting fingers ready, "Sworn to carry my burdens."

"Well yeah."

"What if my burdens are of a sexual nature, are you carrying those too?" Lydia fumed and dropped the sword she had just been handed. She kicked up her foot aimed at the crouching perv's masked face. Kakashi firmly caught the offending appendage and caught the housecarl off balance. He tugged on her ankle and made her fall. "Sloppy."

Lydia's anger didn't stifle at her ungraceful fall and instead she picked herself up with an air of frustration. She didn't let up the dirty look she was throwing at Kakashi and crossed her arms expecting a sort of apology.

"What? You're not going to take a second shot?" Lydia only huffed indigently. Kakashi lightly chuckled before speaking, "I'm only joking, relax. We've already established you do things in the name of honor, whatever that means to you, it obviously doesn't mean doing something you think to be demeaning."

Kakashi noted Lydia's displeasure hadn't dispelled as she picked up the sword she had thrown down moments ago. The jonin had gotten some small satisfaction at getting such a rise but went back to work on the room he was in. Kakashi had stripped the room of anything of value that wasn't bolted down; he handed a good amount over to his new pack mule. He led them out of the cave and started making his way back to Whiterun with an absurd amount of weapons and armor strapped to his back.

When Kakashi and Lydia made it in town it was already afternoon, by the time he finished bartering goods to the various shops in town it was getting close to evening. He returned some man named Amern his sword, but was compensated with sword lessons. Kakashi gently declined the offer and thanked Amern for it. Anything Lydia helped Kakashi carry he let her keep the amount it was worth. She tried to give it back to Kakashi but he refused and even split the pay for clearing out the cave. He intended to keep to his word; any job he would take with Lydia would be split pay.

After everything was sorted Kakashi had a fair bit of coin to get some food and enough for several stiff drinks but he was just shy a few of getting a house. Kakashi settled on the idea of picking up work in the morning but for now he just wanted another drink. He'd already finished all the mead he had picked up this morning from the Drunken Huntsman, as a result he felt lightly buzzed but longed for more. He enjoyed the culture a bit here; mid-day drinking wasn't frowned upon so much. As long as you proved a capable warrior no one batted an eye or asked him constantly if he was okay.

Before Kakashi knew it, both Lydia and he were both sat at the Drunken Huntsman drinking and lightly getting to know one another. He didn't reveal much to her aside that he enjoyed books of a kind of genre, Lydia did most of the talking. She talked about Nord culture and Kakashi feigned attention for the most part. It was getting late and it was time to put his new world guide to the test.

"Say, Lydia do you know a good place I can lay down and get some sleep? I've been sleeping outside the last couple of days and while I don't mind it, I'd really like to get some good rest."

"Well you can stay here at this tavern for the night or you can stay in the Bannered Mare for a night down the street. It's also a tavern like this but bigger."

"I'm not very picky." With that Kakashi was up and headed to the inn keeper of the tavern he was already in. The elfish man led Kakashi to the room with Lydia following silently behind. When Kakashi saw the bed he was mildly disappointed. It wasn't really what he had in mind when he meant a comfortable night's sleep. It wasn't the worst bed he'd slept in but he wished this world had more options aside from wood, hay, and itchy sheets or hides. He longed for his mattress, for his modern amenities. Kakashi was really getting tired of how primitive things where around here.

"Is something wrong my Thane?" Lydia noticed the exasperated expression as Kakashi stared at the bed saying nothing.

"Not your Thane- Lydia do you want to take the bed and I'll take the floor?"

"That's not necessary my Thane, I have a bed back at Dragonsreach still. Until you've acquired a house within this hold I'll be staying at Dragonsreach. Unless you wish for me to guard you and all you own while you rest?"

"I don't need a guard trust me Lydia. I'll come get you in the morning okay? Be ready at daybreak we have some training to do if you're going to be my tag along. I'm going to be selling some worthless junk I've picked up also so we'll have a house tomorrow."

Lydia nodded and took that as a queue that she was being dismissed. Kakashi watched her walk out of the room before getting comfortable on the bed. It was exactly as it looked, itchy. It was going to take some getting used to. _How much longer am I going to be stuck here? Maybe Lydia knows how I can get back? I doubt it but it's worth asking, not like I haven't screamed it into the hillside yet. What if I never get home? _

Kakashi got back up and got a few more drinks, he just couldn't rest with these thoughts on his mind.

x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-

Kakashi was many things, a shinobi, a teacher, an assassin but on time was never one of them. So, when the silverette casually walked into Dragonsreach and saw the irritation being formed on his supposed new companion he couldn't help the smile tugging at his features. "Sorry I'm late. I got lost on the way here and needed assistance from the guards, who gave me confusing directions."

Lydia huffed with her arms crossed." It is my honor to wait for you, my Thane," Lydia said laying on the sarcasm. Kakashi almost felt like patting her head, she was as adorable as his former genin team. If it had not been for the fact that they were both grown adults he probably would have already done so.

"Well, I've got enough to buy a house so I'm going to talk to the Jarl's aide or whoever about buying one. Hope I get some choice property. Then we'll start your training." Kakashi walked up the stairs Lydia following right behind him.

"You know my Thane I don't really need training. I know how to fight common bandits and other dangers and have done so many times on my own. I am a shield maiden and have received formal training most my life with the Jarl."

"Oh, I'm sure you have but if you want to be my tag along I can't have you falling behind. The last thing I need to do is save you from circumstances that are preventable. Besides I get the feeling you know how to sneak as well as a mammoth does."

Lydia scoffed, Kakashi heard it and knew she had something on her mind to share but he was already talking to the Jarl's aide about buying a home.

"So you only have one house available?"

"Yes it's a cozy cottage next to the blacksmith's shop. The former owner has passed away and he had no heir to his property so it was forfeited to the city."

"I guess I'll take it."

"Excellent! Here are the keys to your new home. I'll make the arrangements to have Lydia's personal belongings moved to the spare room. Here is a guide of what we offer if you'd like to decorate your dwelling." Kakashi took the book and keys and gave a spare to Lydia. He wasn't really sure how to feel about sharing his personal space with his new forced companion. It was temporary until he got home but he hadn't lived with another person since he was a young child. Even then his father wasn't home often enough to really count. He guessed this really was no different to sharing his space with the anbu, back when he occasionally slept in the barracks. The more he thought about it he never really had a space. He had a place he went home to, his apartment, but he wasn't home often enough to call it a home. It was just a place he kept some belongings, occasionally ate at, slept at, and showered at.

Kakashi and Lydia made their way to look at the house he just purchased. It was primitive like everything in this forlorn world but it would do. Kakashi thought it was funny the house had a name, Breeze home. It was a cute looking house and he felt the name was appropriate. When he entered he was partially surprised how barren the home was and how dimly lit it was. The only light source was the opaque windows. Kakashi was mildly surprised it came with a bed, but nothing to sit on. He thumbed through the decoration book Proventus gave him and threw it over his shoulder and let it hit the corner of the room with a thud. The jonin then looked over to Lydia to gauge her puzzled expression. He liked how expressive she was, he was going to at least have fun toying with her.

"Well then Lydia, how about we talk about what kinds of things I'll be teaching you," Kakashi sat on the stone floor and motioned for Lydia to do the same. Lydia made a huff and slowly sat on the ground, her armor plates clanking unceremoniously as she did. Kakashi got a piece of charcoal out and began drawing a person on the ground that was sitting like them with a weird looking diagram inside that person.

"Really my thane, this isn't necessary, I am a lethal warrior and proud of what I have to offer."

"I don't doubt that, sure you're a warrior but I'm willing to bet you're no assassin. I'm willing to bet you think there is no honor sneaking in the shadows and that people like me are no better than common criminals. If I'm going to have you tagging along with me, I can't have you running in head long in a charge getting in way over your head because of some preconceived notion of honor." Kakashi looked up from his art to a particularly unhappy nord. Lydia looked ready to bust in anger, Kakashi almost felt like rolling his eyes but kept his aloof glance.

"Lydia, honor is for the dead... All is fair in war, there is no such thing as playing dirty when you use everything to your advantage when your life is on the line."

Lydia just scoffed and pouted in response. Kakashi could tell this wasn't going to be easy; she was stubborn like most of the people here. "You know what I think I have an idea. How's about you and me have a little spar? You can show me what honor has done for you; I can show you what being filthy assassin like me has done for me."

Lydia uncrossed her arms and seemed to think this over before forming a response, "I don't want to hurt you my thane."

"Trust me Lydia there isn't a single thing you could do that would ever hurt me." Kakashi could see she was taking the bait and took it as a challenge to her status as a warrior.

"Fine, but if you get seriously injured it's your own doing," Lydia replied while getting off the floor and following the jonin out the door.

Kakashi took them just outside the city walls out on the planes. There wasn't a soul in sight but Kakashi knew just over the hill the city guard where just there along with the entrance of the town. They could both still see Dragonsreach keep in the distance. Kakashi got his new book out and began reading much to the irritation of his nord follower.

"Well then Lydia I think this is a great spot to show me what you've got."

"Aren't you going to put your book away and draw your weapon?"

"I'm getting to the good part and you won't be able to land a single meaningful blow on me anyway," Kakashi responded nonchalantly. He could see Lydia's nerves were being riled up and he just couldn't help but to think how cute it was. She was like Naruto and Sakura combined in all the best ways and it made him want mess with her. "How's about we make this interesting? If you can take my money pouch off of me I'll let you keep whatever I have. It's right here on my side."

"You're going to be sorry you offered this challenge my thane." With that Lydia lifted her sword and made a charge for the silverette.

Without taking his eyes off his book Kakashi side stepped left from the heavy sword swing coming from above. Lydia seemed surprised, likely at his speed but quickly composed herself. Kakashi had given her the opportunity to shield bash immediately after Lydia's sword swing and she took it. The jonin held out one hand and absorbed the blow without it throwing him off center. Lydia made another attempt at swiping from right to left immediately aimed at Kakashi's upper torso but he ducked the attack swiftly. Now crouched he reached out above him with his free hand grabbing Lydia's over extended sword arm and pulled Lydia over his body tripping her up. Lydia fell unceremoniously on her face as a result. Rolling over quickly, Lydia got to her feet and resumed the fight.

Kakashi only spared minor attention to his opponent. Then he felt something, a spike of energy. Kakashi glanced up narrowing his eye at Lydia who caused the sudden spike.

"_RAAAAAAA~!"_ Lydia let out a guttural scream. It was her Battle Cry. Kakashi felt rudimentary chakra waft over him. Kakashi was mildly surprised, the way Lydia used chakra was much like an untrained child. He wondered if magic was similar. Kakashi wasn't sure what the intended effect was of the chakra shout but it seemed it didn't work on him. Lydia made another charge at the jonin.

Lydia made a few more fruitless swipes of her sword and a few attempts at shield bashing but found it all for naught. Kakashi was able to redirect all her blows and have her trip up on herself. The silverette even caught the blade in one hand a few times as if it had been nothing but a child's toy coming at him. Every time he caught the blade bare handed he was able to pull it out of Lydia's hands and throw it away. Lydia was forced to run after it and pick her sword back up. It was an embarrassing display for her and she was getting so mad.

"Fight me you coward!" yelled Lydia. Kakashi looked up from his book in all his aloofness and slowly glanced up to the now raging nord.

"That's what I'm doing."

"No you're not! You're just dancing around and avoiding all my attacks! I want you to fight me! Throw something back!"

"I don't want to hurt you, besides isn't this fun?"

"Fight me or else I'll call you my Thane to the end of time," Lydia announced in a slight mocking tone. Kakashi hummed, her offer is meant to obviously bait him but he couldn't pass it up so easily.

"You're saying you'll start calling by my name from now on?"

"Yes! Show me what you got!"

"Well, Lydia, I'm going to warn you now this is going to hurt a bit but if it's going to get you to stop calling me some title I could care less about from now on; then brace yourself." Kakashi put the book away.

Kakashi swiftly closed the gap at inhumane speed and kicked her in the stomach. It was so fast Lydia didn't have time to lift her shield and Kakashi could see the surprise on her face as she went flying into grass and dirt only coming to a halt at a boulder. Before Lydia could even think Kakashi was in front of her with his right fist raised to strike. Lydia flinched but slowly realized she wasn't hit. She looked up and saw he'd punched a boulder just above her head. Lydia's eyes had widened in shock when she saw that the boulder had been split into two.

"I'm willing to bet you felt that kick through your armor. I could do so much more damage than I did to this rock."

"H-how? Are you even mortal?" Kakashi could feel a smile tugging at his features again. It was such a silly question but it was such a grand opportunity to toy with her some more.

"I don't know, Lydia, am I?" Kakashi watched as her shock turned to something like horror and he softly chuckled. Lydia was just too easy to mess with. "I'm messing with you, of course I'm mortal. Or I was the last time I checked."

Kakashi helped Lydia stand back up and handed her over the sword she dropped when she was kicked. It seemed her fire to fight him had finally been put to rest. Kakashi made sure she wasn't seriously injured; he wasn't sure just how much of his blow had been absorbed by her armor.

"Well Lydia this has been very fun, but maybe you're more open to me training you?"

"I guess knowing how to split a boulder in half would be a nice thing to know."

"You know just because I want to train you better at stealth doesn't mean you have to sacrifice your beliefs. I know you're proud of being a warrior and that doesn't go away just because what I have to show you. It's not like I'm going to corrupt your mind or something."

"Fine, I just have to ask, why do you want to train me so bad?"

"Well the alternative is I leave you here while I'm out trying to find a way back home and while that's an appealing idea, I need someone who can show me the ins and outs of your society. Lydia I'm not from here and I could really use someone to help me understand things. Someone I feel like I can trust."

Lydia paused and seemed to be thinking about the offer. "You keep saying you're not from around here, so where are you from then?"

Kakashi sighed before replying, "That's a really long story. Let's just say for now, not your dimension from what I've understood."

"Dimension? Are you from oblivion or something?" Lydia asked with mild concern.

"Nope, no where you could possibly comprehend," Kakashi hadn't meant to be so cryptic but it was a hard question to answer properly. Getting back would be painfully difficult if not impossible and the daunting of impossibility haunted him. "Let's just say it's pretty impossible for me to get home."

"So then how did you get here anyway?"

"Long story, for now how's about we agree you're my world guide. With your cultural knowledge I might have hope to returning where I belong."

"You're the man who slayed that dragon, months ago, how long have you been here?"

Kakashi paused at the question; he'd really been here for longer than he liked to admit. Just thinking about it made his palms sweat. He looked back into Lydia's curious eyes and cleared his throat, "Let's just say it's been awhile. Do you want to get to training or are we going to hover around out here and play 20 questions?"

Lydia seemed somewhat disappointed at his response, but made no attempt to press the now agitated jonin. She shrugged and motioned for him to lead the way. Kakashi was grateful the subject was being changed and led Lydia back to Breeze home. The jonin sat back down on the cold stone floor and Lydia hesitantly did the same. Kakashi finished his drawing of a man sitting just like them with his diagram.

"There is a chance you might not be able to absorb what I have to teach due to being born without functioning chakra networks. It seems however the people of this land are very apt at throwing out chakra on a whim. You yourself threw out a very rudimentary chakra spike."

"I did?" Lydia asked brows knitting in confusion.

"Yes, your shout or scream or whatever. It's a very basic use of chakra that you seem to know how to use. You have an energy force within you that you can use to form the magic thing you saw me do in the cave, it's called jutsu. It's made by channeling a spiritual force within you balanced by mind and body." Kakashi then sat in a meditative position just like his drawing motioning Lydia to do the same. She struggled a bit likely due to the heavy armor; Kakashi threw an exasperated glance at her struggle.

"Do you always need to wear heavy armor?"

"Well no- but-"

"Then take it off," Kakashi interrupted.

"And what, sit around nude while you gawk at me, perv."

Kakashi face palmed, there was an obvious solution and she wasn't seeing it. "No just strip down to some normal clothes or something. You're wearing normal clothes under that aren't you?"

"You've never put on this armor plate have you? No I'm not wearing underclothes aside from my, well unmentionables."

"Unmentionables? You mean panties right?" Lydia punched Kakashi's shoulder as hard as she could. He took it like a champ and even pushed her back. "Grow up Lydia we're adults, I have a dick and I wear boxers. Jokes all aside just go change into some clothes I'll wait down here while you change upstairs."

Lydia scoffed her face red; Kakashi couldn't tell if it was from frustration or embarrassment, she stomped up the stairs and dramatically threw what sounded like a drawer open. Kakashi waited patiently as she loudly changed, sounds of steel plate dropping on the ground and some furious ruffling of clothing. Kakashi looked to the stairs when he heard some stomping, creaking the wood panels in protest. Lydia was wearing a basic white long sleeve tunic and some unremarkable pants he'd often seen miner's wear. Although the clothing was loose, he could make out her shape better than her armor and noted she was fit, sturdy, generally a nice physique you'd want out of a kunoichi.

"Better?" Lydia retorted plopping onto the ground besides Kakashi.

"Much. Now then follow my example," Kakashi got back into the meditative position and Lydia followed suit struggling much less in her new attire. Kakashi held out his hand and looked at Lydia expectantly; she hesitantly placed her hand in his. "Now I want you to close your eyes, focus on the world moving underneath you. Take slow deep breaths in and gently exhale. The only energy you need to focus on is the energy I'm feeding you."

There was a long pause between the two. Kakashi eventually got bored and started looking around his barren house. There wasn't anything that stood out and grabbed his attention so he began counting his stone tile flooring.

"Can you stop moving around it's hard to focus on the world moving beneath me. This is ridiculous, what am I looking for exactly?" Lydia asked. Kakashi drew a long sigh.

"It's easy really. Clear your mind, think of the world moving beneath you. We're on a rotating planet, take deep controlled breaths. You're looking for my life force. It should feel like a tickling sensation. I'll send you some more chakra but you need to focus."

The room fell quiet and Kakashi tried staying as still as he could. He began counting backwards from a hundred dipping into the negatives.

"…I- I think I'm feeling it? It's like a warm buzzing sensation."

"That is my chakra. Think of it like thick water, or plasma. I want you to channel it back to me." Kakashi waited patiently. A long silence passed between them before he finally felt familiar energy tickling its way back into him. "You now know what chakra feels like; I want you to find your own now. Send me your energy."

It was quiet between them for a long moment. Kakashi could feel his foot falling asleep and could feel Lydia's hand getting warm in his. He really wanted to get up and get a drink but he wasn't going to throw in the towel so early. He began to recite some of his favorite Icha Icha book in the back of his mind. When he reached chapter 5 in the back of his mind, he felt it. At first it was just a trickle a few tickles of a buzzing sensation between their palms, then a strong buzzing sensation hit him like a large body of water. Kakashi broke their connection and channeled the excessive amounts of chakra into a dagger he had on him and threw it into a wooden beam in the house. Electricity buzzed around the dagger and Kakashi took a deep breath.

"Huh, you sure do have a lot of energy don't you?"

"Is- was that? Not normal?"

"Well, your reserves are more than what I would have expected from someone untrained. So I wasn't really prepared to intake such a volume of chakra so fast."

"That's good right?"

"It's great. Aside from that it seems you and I share an elemental affinity, we both have a strong affinity for lighting. You have a second affinity but I can't really figure it out. I'm not really a sensory type so finding out your second nature may take some time, especially since I have no way of manufacturing chakra papers."

"So what's next? What do I do with this energy?"

"What a fantastic question Lydia, you need to learn control. Let's go for a walk."

"Um, okay let me just go put my armor back on."

"No time it'll slow you down, come on let's go." Kakashi shoved Lydia out the house and guided her to a particularly tall tree just outside the city walls. "If I can teach you control before I teach you jutsus, there's a chance you might learn faster. Being that I don't have the books to teach you like I would academy students we're just going to have to learn everything hands on and visually."

Lydia had no time to respond and appeared confused but that grew into shock when Kakashi walked out vertically onto the tree defying gravity itself.

"Lydia, all you need to do is channel that chakra into the soles of your feet. You do just the right amount and you'll be walking on this tree with me. Too little chakra you'll fall off the tree, too much chakra and it'll crush the bark and propel you backwards and you'll fall off the tree." Lydia made one attempt and instantly fell onto her back. As she was on her back she looked face to face with Kakashi and gave him a frustrated glance.

"This is ridiculous, are you doing this just to see me look dumb?"

Kakashi chuckled softly before deadpanning a, "No." He jumped off the tree and landed beside the housecarl and gave her a hand up. "You can do it too, it just takes practice. Lots and lots of practice; keep at it and climbing up trees, and walls, and so on will just be second nature to you. You keep working on this exercise and I'll be sitting over here reading. We'll take lunch at noon, it's on me."

Lydia drew a long sigh and got to work on the tree. Kakashi got his new book out and sat in the grass leaning under a nearby tree keeping his eye on his latest apprentice. She pulled a face at the sight of the book but quickly refocused her efforts on the tree. Kakashi almost felt renewed sense of determination well up in himself as he watched Lydia fall down and pick herself back up. _Almost._

* * *

_**Thank you for reading! Please leave a review, I enjoy all forms of criticism creative or otherwise. If you have any questions I will try to answer as promptly as possible. **_


	2. Chapter 2: I Offer

**A/N: I'll keep the one up here brief. There is definitely more at the bottom. I'm very sorry it has taken me this long to post the next chapter. I plan on keeping an update schedule for one to two times a month. Big thank you to my primary editor midnightprelude who you can find at archiveofourown users/midnightprelude . Also big thank you to Slizzah here on FFnet who originally helped beta this chapter. This chapter would not be as nearly as amazing as it is without them. I hope you enjoy :)**

* * *

_I offer myself to you_  
_whole and honestly_  
_I'm overwhelmed_  
_who keeps all this_  
_where is your head_  
_it's gone. It's all gone_

_It's awful but it keeps you warm_  
_focused on the outside_  
_sense of no one_  
_who keeps all this_  
_where is your head_  
_it's gone. It's all gone_

_This is my offering to the king of the far_  
_to help me get to wherever you are_  
_I followed myself to the end of the earth_

_To stay_  
_and leave_  
_I know I would always,_  
_Just leave_

_-Hēran Soun, "I Offer"_

* * *

It was dark outside the stars obscured by black clouds with the moons hidden. It was late, but Lydia couldn't really be surprised that her father wasn't home yet. Part of her felt upset that he wasn't home when he should have been. Lydia had spent most of the day in training. Her forearms throbbed from the burden of lugging around a shield and sword all day. She was barely getting used to the weight and it just wasn't very proportional for her, a skinny young teenager. While she was fine on short term use, to be doing it all day certainly added up to the pain that lingered in shoulders and arms. Lydia groaned from both the exhaustion and irritation she felt.

A thunderstorm was rolling in over the horizon. Lydia could hear distant booms and flashes light up the horizon. The wind bellowed from the quickening encroachment sending cold breezes and whispers across the landscape. Lydia had no doubt it was going to start pouring soon. Gritting through the soreness, she stood deciding that she should probably go looking for her father before he drowned in a ditch somewhere in town.

Lydia left the heavy equipment home and began making her way to the inner walls of Whiterun. Her father insisted they live just outside of Whiterun and its outskirts to avoid taxes. It's a decision that placed their home just outside a fort and down the road from the last guard tower. Something that also put their home just outside of guard protection, it made their home the target of several would-be thieves and bandits. It didn't take long for thieves and bandits alike to realize the little home on the edge of town just didn't have anything worth the hassle, especially when Lydia was old enough to defend it. Granted she wasn't the best with a sword currently, she'd give most men a hassle with the dagger she always kept on her. She was just small enough and quick enough to out maneuver most bandits that dared cross her in a closed space.

When Lydia finally made it in town she was quickly approached by Idolaf Battle-Born and his younger brother Jon. Idolaf had a mischievous look on his face while Jon looked uncomfortable; Lydia already knew there was going to be trouble.

"Well, well look at what the skeever's dragged in. If it isn't the bastard daughter of a forgotten whore, looking for your drunken old man again, aye Lyd?" Idolaf leered.

Lydia wasn't surprised, Idolaf always made a habit to pick on her. She didn't know why the eldest Battle-Born son had it out for her other than he thought he was high and mighty due to his clan heritage. Personally, she didn't think his name would save him from her blade, should she choose to swing it his direction. "Fuck off Idolaf, I don't have time for your crap today."

"Ha!" he sneered, the look pure enmity. "Wanna say that again louder. I think you're forgetting your place."

"Come on brother, we should go," Jon said grabbing Idolaf making an attempt to dissuade him. "We're garnering too much attention."

Idolaf yanked his arm from the scrawny pre-teen boy. "No, she needs to learn her place. Besides the guards don't care, her dad's a cheapskate, always skirting taxes."

"What, you're going to hit a girl to make you feel tough and big?" Lydia retorted.

"So what if I do? Who's going to stop me, your drunken father?" Idolaf responded giving Lydia a push, causing her to stumble, despite her best intentions. As soon as she was pushed back an arrow gleamed between the two and caught some of Idolaf's hair before landing in a wooden post across the street. A tall beautiful red headed woman strode from the shadows of a tavern, bow held aloft.

"Oh fuck-! It's Aela's crazy ass mom, let's scram! This isn't over skeever brains!" Idolaf shouted as he ran off, brother in tow. The huntress slowly approached Lydia slinging her bow back over her shoulder.

"Someone should really talk to the Battle-Borns about spoiling their dumb brats. You okay, kiddo?" asked the huntress.

"Thank you Missus Ylva," Lydia replied with relief. She was glad Aela's mom had been around. Had Lydia dared raise a hand against Idolaf in town it would have only given her trouble with the gaurds. Ylva however was much more respected by the town.

"No problem, anything for my daughter's friends and especially for the Raven's daughter. Don't let that milk drinking brat get you down. No matter your heritage, you're a tough kid. If you're looking for Fjoek, he's just down the road at the tavern. He's passed out at one of the tables, if they haven't thrown him out yet anyway. Need a hand?"

Lydia smiled, Aela's mom wasn't always in town but when she was, she was always looking out for her. "No thanks, I've got it this time. I've been practicing lugging around my own shield and weapons. I think I can get my father home, thanks."

"You might be stronger, but at least let me help you to the town gates. Don't want those Battle-Born brats to think you're a target all the sudden." Lydia nodded in agreement and they both walked in relative silence to their destination. When they drew near Lydia spotted the large darkly cloaked man in a ditch in front of the tavern, her father passed out. Aela's mother got close to the man and kicked him which earned a groan.

"You drunken fool, are you making your daughter drag you back home again, Fjoek?"

"Ylva, you mean bitch, what are you doing here?" Fjoek said slurring and groaning.

"Keeping your daughter from being attacked by those Battle-Born brats," Ylva said pointing over to Lydia. Fjoek looked up and over to Lydia, surprise flashing across his features.

"Sorry my little saber cat," Fjoek said tenderly, sitting up now. Fjoek ruffled the back of his hair nervously. His sorry disposition only served to agitate Lydia. Her father had to know by now this wasn't okay.

"Save it father, let's just get home. I can feel a storm coming, and I'd prefer not to trudge through the mud," Lydia responded. Both Ylva and Lydia hoisted Fjoek up, though he shifted the bulk of his weight to Ylva's shoulder. When they finally made it to the town gates Ylva let up on her grip on Fjoek and let him fall ungracefully on the ground when Lydia couldn't catch him. The sudden jerk of weight on her shoulder was too fast and too much for her to be prepared for. She willfully let her father fall when pain shot through her already aching shoulders, so she didn't fall with him.

"_Oof-!_ Ugh- That really hurt Ylva!" Fjoek moaned.

"Good. Hope you learn your lesson, although I doubt you have. You never do," Ylva responded. "Lydia, my daughter Aela says hi. She's been busy making a name for herself among the Companions, and I know you've been busy with the Jarl. Still, you should stop by some time. Our home in Jorrvaskr is always open to you."

"Thanks Missus Ylva," Lydia replied genuinely grateful for the help so far. The huntress nodded and turned back around heading back to whence she came.

Lydia began the arduous process of dragging her father home. She had not been exaggerating her increase in strength to Ylva, but it just wasn't realistic to carry the man home. Not in her current state. Honestly, she probably couldn't have done so fully rested, let alone after a full day of exercise. Fjoek didn't say much as she dragged his almost seemingly lifeless form across cobble streets. He looked out of it and mumbled occasionally but made no real attempt at conversation. The lightning lit up their surroundings and the night sky with a few flickers; followed by booming thunder. Lydia prayed she could drag this man fast enough to make it home before it began pouring.

The divines did not favor her. Halfway through the journey home it began to pour.

"Dammit," Lydia hissed under her breath. She was beginning to regret not taking Ylva's offer. Then again Lydia just didn't like asking for help, especially when it came to her father; it was just embarrassing to her. Fjoek groaned more when rain began pelting down on them but he didn't get up and continued to allow Lydia to drag him. Lydia felt anger bubbling in her like she hadn't felt before. None of this would be happening if her father wasn't who he was. If he could just use his last septim on a room for the night rather than another drink.

"Hey- hey there my little saber cat, you okay?" The man Lydia was dragging barely audible against the booming thunder and heavy rain fall.

"No father I'm not okay. Ugh- I'm going to get soaked!" Lydia hissed grinded out between teeth while struggling hurriedly with his heavy body dragging in the forming mud. Lydia's father mumbled more but was incomprehensible against the raging storm that was upon them. Lydia didn't bother straining to listen; she knew well nothing he said was really worth her time in this moment. When Lydia finally reached their humble abode, she opened the door and let it swing open with the wind. She dragged Fjeok's body in and fought the door closed.

When she finally had a moment to collect herself, she finally noticed how truly drenched she was, water pooling from her body onto the hardwood floor. Fjeok was mumbling to himself and laughing, about what Lydia did not know nor care. She stepped over his drenched cloak and made her way over to the fireplace and got to work as quickly as possible.

"Ya- ya know this reminds me of this one time. Crazy storm, me and my old regiment was having the times of our lives at this tavern and-"

"Dad, do any of your stories not involve drinking?" Lydia interrupted. The man seemed to pause and the jovial expression had all but faded. Lydia had successfully started a fire and went to her side of the house that was divided by a partition. She quickly changed into dry clothing and collected her soaked ones to let dry by the fire. When she returned her father looked glum but she couldn't find pity for him today.

"Come on saber cat, you love my stories." Lydia's father slurred.

"Yeah Father, maybe when I was eight."

"What's wrong? It's not like I get to be in town with you often."

"Maybe it'd be better if you stopped coming back." Lydia said harshly. She was sick and tired of having to deal with all the trouble he brought her.

"Lydia," Fjoek moaned, pain evident in his voice. "Come on, what's the matter kiddo? Why are you being so mean to your old man? You're going to hurt my feelings."

"Why can't I just have a normal father that doesn't drink himself under the table? I'm so sick of it. You're just an embarrassment. All the kids in town make fun of me because of you. And then I have to drag you back home in a storm like this just so you don't drown in a ditch somewhere. How do you even function when you're not home?" Lydia snapped, not giving her father time to answer.

"I wish you weren't my Dad." Lydia spit the words out with a deep cold harshness. She could see the shock wash over his face, rose-tinted from the excessive drink. Fjoek struggled to find words and was left gaping on the floor like a fish out of water. Lydia stormed out and back behind her partition where her bed was. She normally put a warm cloak over her father but she didn't today. Lydia could hear her father murmur incomprehensibly. When he blissfully quieted down Lydia found sleep.

. . . . . .

The cold was biting at her when she was beginning to awaken; the room was dimly lit by sunlight peaking through opaque windows. There was a series of rapid knocking at the door that made her jump out of bed. She was still groggy as she hesitated at the door for a second but grabbed her blade that was nearby before opening the door. She relaxed when she saw two Whiterun guards but uneasiness was settling at why they would be out here to begin with.

"Can I help you?" Lydia asked the two masked individuals. Only being able to see black voids stare back at her made the uneasiness clench at her guts.

"Lydia, Daughter of Fjoek the Raven?" The guard closest to Lydia asked.

"Aye, sir that would be me."

"It is with great misfortune I must announce Fjeok the Raven is no longer of this world."

Lydia balked, shock striking her very core. "I'm- I'm sorry what?"

"Your father is dead," the second man said with a clear lack of compassion.

The first guard sort of looked back to his companion and threw a gesture as if to silently say,_ "What was that?"_

The second piped up again, "Well maybe Fjoek should pay his taxes like a good man. We wouldn't even be here if he'd have only chosen to die outside of the city. What man chooses to drown himself in the Dragonsreach moat?"

Lydia couldn't hear anything else. It was as if the world itself had been put on mute and grief had struck itself in her.

x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x

Things were bustling in the tavern: groups spoke excitedly among themselves, the bard was louder than before, the barmaid was weaving between people handing drinks out. It was the climax of the evening at the tavern and Kakashi sat alone in the corner, table crowded with empty bottles. He looked into the bottom of his latest emptied drink; there was a small bit of liquid at the bottom swirling with gentle movements of his hand. Kakashi felt his surroundings muddled in a blur as reality felt distorted.

It was looked down upon in the shinobi world to drown oneself constantly in drinks. Yet it was little surprise shinobi took to bars seeking comfort in liquor. It was just a product of their profession; death was not an easy thing to cope with. Everyone had found some way to deal with their problems, some with a little help from alcohol. Kakashi never found liquor as his go to way of handling his burdens. Maybe as something to enjoy occasionally in certain social settings or after a particularly difficult day, but now he could only find bliss at the bottom of a bottle.

There were many things Kakashi had lost in his life. He had at one point lost everyone he had ever cared about. However he was able to come back from his loss and recover in time. He was certainly a person accustom to loss more than most. However, this time Kakashi didn't just lose everyone, he lost his home.

Kakashi was fiercely loyal to Konoha for many reasons, but one was more important than all. While he didn't see his apartment as much of a home in itself, his village was a home. Though he could claim no personal ownership over any of its land outside his apartment, there was no more an important place for him to be. He had just about memorized every building and could walk the village blind if he wanted to. He remembered every tree outside the walls at least ten feet out. He could easily recall every river and every path thorough out The Fire Country. He had always grown with the village as it also grew with him. However, he was beginning to notice something.

Kakashi's prolonged absence was having an effect on his memory. He could no longer recall what most of the village looked like anymore. First it was a subtle loss not being able to place certain colors to certain buildings. Then it became alarming when he couldn't exactly recall the location of conversations he remembered having with friends. It got worse when trying to recall what exactly Gai sounded like or if Naruto had three or four whisker marks a cheek. Since Kakashi no longer had the spatial reminder the memories seemed to slip away like it was all a dream.

Konoha in some ways was the last thing Kakashi could claim, it was one of the last things he had managed to hold onto from the start of his life. Sure he was gone often on missions for sometimes as long as a few months but he always came back. His profession often required one to be okay with a vagabond existence, going place to place, barely home long enough to really be home. Still he always knew he would be back in the village eventually. This time it was different.

No matter how much Kakashi wanted to cling onto the shadow of a hope he'd one day be home, it was just logically unattainable. The circumstances that brought him here were completely out his control, though he did feel some level of responsibility. He could in no way copy what exactly brought him here. Add to it that even if he were to return would Konoha even still be there? Likely not. When Konoha needed him the most he failed and was propelled into an entirely different universe. Losing his home was bad enough and he might have coped but he had also lost everyone else with it.

Kakashi's hand tightened over the bottle he was playing with. Just then the barmaid had approached him.

"Can I get you another?" The Redguard woman offered Kakashi holding out a couple bottles. An irrational displacement of anger flashed through him but he quickly calmed it. Kakashi hefted a sigh and the Redgaurd only gave him a mild concerned glance, likely concern over her own safety.

Kakashi couldn't resist, for as sloshed as he was feeling it wasn't enough. He just wanted to rest his mind, maybe forget for just a few moments why he was finding himself at the bottom of another bottle.

"Sure," Kakashi kept it brief and exchanged coin for drink. He hoped he didn't sound or look how he felt. The Redgaurd was satisfied by the transaction and went back to her business like whatever had happened didn't. Then he remembered no one would have cared anyway if he was drunk. All his comforts were gone and all that was left was another bottle of mead to indulge in. Kakashi was just another lost soul in a place seemingly full of them.

Kakashi was very accustomed to feeling alone but this was absolutely the loneliest he had ever been.

The tavern began to fade and so did his memory.

. . . . . .

Slowly Kakashi awoke with the room was spinning so fast it almost made him want to upchuck. He was able to keep it down but he really needed a drink. Kakashi reached over to the night stand reaching for another bottle of mead only knocking over a few empty bottles. After a few clangs of glass on wooden floor boards he managed to fish the bottle he didn't finish last night. Kakashi chugged it and felt lukewarm liquid slosh at the back of his throat. It tasted bitter, like an old left out black coffee but the smell was much less pleasant. As dissatisfactory as the drink was he really needed another. He dug another out from the confines of night stand drawer. After babying the drink long enough the headache was starting slowly subside.

Kakashi felt groggy, as if he were in a haze. Still he slowly crawled out of bed and pulled a custom made tunic he had over his head. Kakashi adjusted the mask aspect of his tunic and slowly made his way downstairs to the smells of beef of some kind being cooked. Lydia wasn't anywhere around and no one was cooking. He looked over to the table and saw a hand written note besides a shiny metal cloche used to cover food.

_Good Morning Sir,_

_ I made some Horker Loaf for you and got you some leeks too, since you like your greens so much. I had a hard time getting you inside last night; you really put up a fight my Thane. You even got in a brawl at The Bannered Mare, I think you really scared Mikael last night. You kept saying you did it for Carlotta? So I talked to her and she gave her thanks and asked me to give you some coin for your trouble. I left it at your bedside and took half since you keep insisting I take half of your job money. I'm training at the tree, practicing my control, if you need me._

_Your Housecarl,_

_Lydia_

Kakashi lifted the cloche and was surprised by the meal laid out for him. Lydia had been very kind to him lately almost uncharacteristically generous. He would've normally been paranoid but Lydia was easy to read. She didn't seem to have an ounce of deception in her; much like her people she was blunt and lacked tact. Still it was strange that she was being so thoughtful.

Maybe Kakashi just wasn't used to being around thoughtful people? There were only so few people he'd meet to be honest and blunt, one of whom was obnoxiously blunt. Otherwise Kunochi and Shinobi alike had motive for being friendly. Deception was his world and those who were not would not be nearly as kind as Lydia was being to him. Lydia went out of the way for him in a manor he'd only seen servants of a feudal lord do. Kakashi sort of liked it but it was somewhat off putting, like there was a disingenuous element behind it.

Kakashi ate the food quietly and began trying to piece together a reason for Lydia being so kind. He hadn't done anything to warrant it, if anything he had been an annoying asshat to her. Maybe Genma was right, you have to be an annoying asshat if you wanted the fairer sex to be all over you. Kakashi made a mental note to himself to let Tenzo onto the little secret if he ever got home and simply compartmentalized the rest of the thought.

The jonin finished the meal laid out for him and began to clean off the table. Lydia had talked him into furnishing their drab house and she even split the payment with him. Had it been up to him, Kakashi would be sitting and eating off the floor. It had been a week since he and Lydia started living together. She really added a feminine touch to the place that he wouldn't have bothered with. The book he threw on the floor a week ago was now on a mostly empty bookshelf.

Kakashi strapped his leather armor on and grabbed a few bottles of mead he had stashed. Kakashi strode out the door, the morning air felt crisp and refreshing. He missed the warm summer mornings in Konoha but he had to admit Whiterun and Skyrim wasn't terrible. The lack of people was something to adapt to having been in a larger village most his life. Kakashi slowly strolled out of the town walls and down the primitive cobblestone path. Kakashi made it to a set of tall trees off the beaten path and close to the mountain range where he found Lydia. There she was falling and getting back up. Kakashi had to admit his newest apprentice had made a considerable amount of progress for someone who hadn't been put through the academy.

"Good morning, sunshine," Kakashi called out. Lydia fell ungracefully having her attention diverted.

"Ow… Good morning, sir."

"Well you stopped calling me Thane which is an improvement but I'm not you're superior, stop calling me sir. It's Kakashi."

"Yes sir," Lydia said smile on her face but still sprawled on the ground. Kakashi only narrowed his visible eye and cleared his throat.

"Eh-heh, right... Lydia, I'm going out to do a job-"

"I can go with you!" Lydia interrupted.

"No. You're going to stay here and train. You've made a lot of improvement; I want you to keep at it. Besides I have a surprise for you later and having you tag along now will just spoil it."

Lydia pouted and Kakashi couldn't help but to chuckle. She'd sometimes respond to him the way he expected a brat would, it was comical occasionally. Kakashi crouched down and pulled a twig free from her hair, Lydia's pout turned to a thankful glance. Kakashi didn't initially think much of it as he flicked the twig into the grass, but he had to remind himself this wasn't really a student. That probably wasn't appropriate between two peers.

"I'll be back before you know it, if you don't have enough for food, I left some coin on the table. I shouldn't be gone long."

"Fine. Watch yourself, Kakashi," Lydia said softly.

Kakashi caught something sincere in her eyes and felt something; a tug, a flitter, something in his chest. He had an urge to touch her face but quickly repressed it. He broke their gaze and stood up while clearing his throat. "See? Was that so hard…? Thanks for the meal by the way. I'll see you in a bit."

Kakashi walked down the stone path and began to thumb through his book. He stole a glance back and noticed Lydia had gone back to her exercise. She was near the top of the tree before she fell again. Her work ethic was something to be admired, always up at dawn and didn't quit unless she needed to.

Kakashi was amazed with her progress. It would typically take untrained person days to understand how to channel chakra but she managed it in a particularly long afternoon. Now she was getting a hand on chakra control for someone not formally trained. She was not only determined but intelligent, features often lacked in most students which were typically one way or the other.

Slowly Lydia faded over the horizon as did her tree and Kakashi went back to the book in his hand.

x-x-x-x-x-x

Lydia started catching herself and landing on her feet every time she fell off the tree. Landing constantly on her back was starting to take its toll so she adjusted to catch herself when she could. When the sun was high in the sky she decided to head back in town to get some lunch. Kakashi had left her coin but she didn't need it, she had plenty saved up from odd jobs they picked up. She headed over to the Bannered Mare and took a seat at the bar ordering some cheap meal of the day.

Lydia was spacing off while eating and was surprised when a person pulled up a bar stool to sit so closely to her. She looked over to the new occupant and was thrown into even more shock. Sitting beside her was none other than Aela the Huntress. Aela ordered quickly before returning her attention to Lydia.

"Hey old friend, how goes the hunt?"

Lydia was a bit surprised at seeing the Companion; it had really been some time since she'd seen Aela. "Aela, what are you doing here? Surely there's plenty of mead and food to be had at Jorrvaskr," Lydia asked.

"Aye, there is, I came here to see you. I saw you walk in and thought I'd like to catch up," Aela said.

"Always were the watchful one, huntress; good to see you. We haven't talked in quite some time. I heard you're pretty big with the Companions now."

"Sure am. I hear you finally got assigned a Thane, an enigma of a man who slayed that dragon some time ago. He treating you okay?"

"He's a bit annoying from time to time. Kind of lecherous if you ask me, otherwise a lot better than I was expecting."

"You know, if your father was still around I'm sure he'd be proud of you." Lydia smiled a bit at the comment. Aela smiled in return and patted the housecarl on the shoulder before speaking again, "If it wasn't for your old man being so set in his ways, you would have made a fine addition to The Companions."

Aela shifted her glance back to her mug of mead and swirled it a bit before changing her tone to something more serious, "I saw you doing some kind of tree thing, your Thane's idea?"

Lydia faltered a bit and her smile dropped. She nervously tucked a loose strand of hair behind her ear before responding. "Oh that, yeah, it's just something he thinks will make me stronger."

"How did he talk you into doing magic?"

"He said it wasn't really magic. He split a boulder in half with just his hand. He was able to grab my sword with his bare hand without getting cut. He's able to walk on walls. I don't know; I know we look down on that kind of thing around here, but he said he won't have me tag along with him unless I learn how to do what he does."

"You know Lydia I kind of want to warn you about him. The way he walks, it's like he's a predator among prey. He's always on guard even when he looks like he's not. His eye, it's the kind of eyes I'd seen on men who held no regard for life."

"Pff- you sure we're talking about the same man? I know he's got some bizarre tricks up his sleeve but he was pretty upset a few days ago when I killed some mutt. Seems like a kind of soft guy to me."

"Could just be a façade. It's what predators do, you know? They lower your guard and catch you when you least expect it. Look all I'm saying is take a minute to look how he walks and separate it from how we walk. You'll see it too, have you ever heard his footsteps before?"

Lydia did take a moment to think it over and the more she did the more she realized Aela wasn't wrong. Anytime Kakashi moved around the floor boards the housecarl wouldn't hear a thing. There were more than a few occasions that he'd snuck up on Lydia and surprised her. She even told him a couple of times to stop sneaking up on her; it always caught her off guard.

"Hmm, I guess I can't say that I really remember. Who remembers that kind of stuff anyway, Aela?"

"Well if you ever go missing, I'm going to personally hunt the man down myself."

Lydia lightly giggled; it was good to know she still always had a friend in Aela the Huntress. "I'm going to be fine. Thanks, though. I really need to get back to that tree thing."

"Heh- well don't be a stranger, you should stop by Jorrvaskr sometime. I'd love to introduce you to my shield mates one day. They're really like my family."

Lydia smiled at the huntress and nodded before heading out onto the streets. It had been a while since she'd sat down with Aela and it was comforting talking with her again. She hadn't really talked to Aela since joining the Jarl when she was a teenager. Plus, Aela was likewise busy with joining the companions at the same time. While the two were friends as kids, they were never really close enough to keep tabs on one another. The town was small and they'd see each other every now and again but nothing more than nods and hellos were ever exchanged by the two.

It was surprising Aela had come to speak with Lydia. The housecarl was back to the tree exercise but was taking the warning she was given by her old friend to heart. Lydia would at least be a bit more cautious than she would have otherwise. It was just so hard to really take the warning seriously when the man reminded her of her father.

Lydia never knew the demons that plagued her father. Out of some morbid curiosity she wanted to know Kakashi's. Was it morbid or nosy if she put good intention behind it? To help him find the peace her father never got. Maybe in helping Kakashi she would be finally put her father's ghost to rest. Although a part of her doubted it and part of her knew there was nothing selfless in prodding in Kakashi's business. Lydia barely knew the man.

Kakashi was an absolute enigma and Lydia had a desire to know more about him. Their spar a week ago was what convinced her to learn what he had to teach. The way he moved was graceful but with pointed fury. Lydia had never seen a man move with Kakashi's speed. Her blows where meaningless to him and it was really unsettling. Lydia had fought against her fair share of magic users, lesser dremora, bandits and other such enemies but Kakashi fought like none of them. Lydia had expected to have the advantage on Kakashi's magic since she fought up close but that just wasn't the case. If he was a mage, he was unlike any other she had seen. Most magic users were afraid of up close combat and preferred standing atop some hill and raining down lightning and fireballs form long to mid range. Not Kakashi, though he excelled at hand-to-hand in a way that Lydia wanted desperately to learn. Lydia needed to know more about him.

The more Lydia thought on Kakashi the more she had thoughts wandering to his appearance. He really wasn't a bad looking man. She liked his hair; it was silver and shone like an elf's. He wasn't an elf though; maybe he was Breton? His height would likely disqualify him from that assumption, however. His one visible eye held so much intensity. It seemed faintly aloof and distant, yet occasionally friendly and inviting.

Lydia really wanted to know what her Thane was hiding under the mask. He'd been able to elude her every attempt at unmasking the man. Whether Kakashi had been blackout drunk or otherwise there wasn't a single time he'd been unclothed near her. She could tell he was fit, anytime she'd carried him back home she'd felt his muscles under whatever clothes he'd be wearing.

Lydia snapped out of her day dreams when she noticed it was getting dark. She picked some food up at the market to make herself for the evening. When she got home, she noticed that her fellow housemate wasn't home yet. Lydia was slightly worried as Kakashi had stated he'd have been back before she knew it. He'd only left enough coin for a lunch meal, not that she needed it, but it suggested he'd have been back by now. Lydia just shrugged it off and ate her dinner in peace. She thought about going back outside and practicing more, but decided against it. She wanted to be home whenever Kakashi returned.

Lydia picked up a book she'd gotten the other day to make the single decoration book on the shelf look less lonely. She started reading by the fire pit comfortable in her chair. This one was about an adventurer, Calder Stormborn, being lost in strange foreign faraway lands. The book was made to reflect some of the first explorations nords had with lands like Elsweyr and Marrowind. This was one of her favorite books growing up. Though she had mixed feelings about the ending, it ends in tragedy and Calder loses the friend he'd made on the journey. Lydia would sometimes just skip the ending and imagine a different ending all together.

Lydia could have not said precisely when she had fallen asleep in the chair. Her neck was stiff and aching.

Lydia had a particularly strange dream. She was running in snow trying to catch up to a darkly cloaked man. The figure managed to always stay ahead of her while he walked, even though she was running frantically. She would trip every now and again disturbing fresh snow. She yelled out to the figure but her screams where muffled. Finally the figure turned to look back at her; initially she could only see hair peeking out from the shadows of the hood. The hair was shiny bright and almost glowed in the gloomy setting. Lydia frantically tripped and trudged through the snow while straining to get a noise out of any of her yells. The hooded figure removed his hood and she was shocked at what she was looking at- a man with no face.

. . . . .

*THUD-!*

Lydia promptly shot out of her rest when she heard the heavy thud at the door. She jumped up and grabbing the nearest weapon, which unfortunately happened to be a broom handle. There was a fiddling sound around the lock before the door swung wide open. The man that was leaning on the door collapsed onto the stone ground with a duller thud. Lydia lowered the broom handle when she recognized the man; it was none other than Kakashi sprawled on the floor.

"My Thane?"

"I- I'm not- I'm not your Thane, Lydia," Kakashi slurred. Lydia rushed over to Kakashi to offer a hand up; when he didn't take it, she tried grabbing him. Kakashi pushed her hand away and struggled getting up himself, trying and failing at getting a hold on the door frame.

"Sir, just let me help you."

"I-I can take care of myself. Stop grabbing me." Kakashi made it barley to his feet before crashing down again. "_Oof_-! That hurt."

"Stop being so stubborn, just take my hand."

"I'm not stubborn, you're stubborn!" Kakashi slurred, slapping away another attempt at grabbing him.

"KAKASHI!" Lydia bellowed stomping a foot down. She was losing her patience. "I'm not asking you again take my hand."

"Fu- Fuck, Lydia. Sensei once said hath, um, hell hath? Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned." Kakashi stopped making attempts at standing and let Lydia help him. Kakashi was heavy and his constant swaying made it hard for her to keep her balance. Lydia managed to lift Kakashi out of the door way, close it and drag him up the stairs into bed. "I don't… I don't feel too good."

Lydia was pulling a hide over Kakashi when he grabbed another bottle of mead from his person. Lydia pried the bottle from his hand and placed it out of his reach while grabbing some water.

"No, wait, Lydia. I need that! I _really_ don't feel good."

"It's not going to make you feel better. Here, have some water." She held a glass out towards him, gingerly.

"I'm- gonna, I'm gonna," Kakashi made some dry heaving sounds and Lydia quickly grabbed the bed pan. Kakashi pulled his mask down and lost the contents of his stomach in the pan. Lydia tried her best to get a glance at the man without his mask but he was very careful. It was like he'd practiced avoiding looks all his life and he used his arm to block the view. He finished heaving into the bed pan and pulled his mask up.

"I'm so tired Lydia."

"Then maybe you should get some rest."

"I don't- I don't want to." Lydia pulled up another hide onto Kakashi and grabbed a couple of things turning out to leave the room. She stopped when she felt a firm grip on her left wrist, she tried tugging free but it was pointless. "Wait- Wait- I just, please don't leave me. I- I don't wanna be alone~."

He looked absolutely pathetic, his visible eye begging. Lydia clicked her tongue before responding, "I need to throw out this bed pan. I'll be right back okay?"

"I don't wanna- want to be alone… anymore."

"You won't be. I'll be right back." Kakashi let up his grasp on Lydia's wrist and let her collect things in the room before heading out. She'd seen him like this a few times but this time his guard was completely off. It was almost unsettling that he made no attempts to keep his feelings secret to the world like he typically did when he drank. If he'd been blackout drunk before it was more than likely he wouldn't remember any of this. Lydia wondered where he had been most of the day. She wondered if anyone in town could give her Kakashi's whereabouts. Lydia resisted the urge to search and slowly walked back to Kakashi's room, cleaned out bed pan in hand.

He was still awake. "You came back~."

"Of course I did. How about I read a book? It's not nearly as explicit as your usual reading material, but it should do well. This one's about an adventurer named Calder it's one of my favorites."

"Lydia- I'm sorry."

"What do you have to be sorry about?"

"Everything… You shouldn't, _have to_ take care of me. I'm fine really. I- I just, I'm so tired Lydia," Kakashi slurred barely audible. There was something glistening in his visible eye. Lydia felt uncomfortable- looking at him brought back memories of her father in this state.

"Stop it. I'm just doing what anyone would, okay? We're partners right?"

"Yea-h… Partners," Kakashi slurred. Lydia reached out and started fiddling with his fingers. She used to rub circles in her father's palm to calm him and it was having a similar effect on Kakashi. It was quiet for a long time between them, Kakashi slowly dosed off. Lydia stayed at Kakashi's side, still rubbing circles into his palm quietly. It seemed to have the same effect on her as it did on him- the soothing motion beginning to still her own feelings. She could not help herself. She was worried for him.

Lydia didn't really know this man. She didn't owe him anything, but she couldn't in good conscience leave him to his own devices. He needed someone just like her father did. Lydia wasn't there for her father and now he's gone. An intruding thought came to mind. Was she doing this for her father, for herself, or this strange man? None of which was appropriate, right? Or maybe she was craving attention. An even more uncomfortable thought Lydia quickly shut down and pushed aside.

Lydia sighed but continued to rub circles in Kakashi's palm while leaning partly on the bedside. She began to doze off sat in a chair pulled up close.

. . . . .

Lydia was abruptly awoken by Kakashi thrashing around on the bed that she had been partially resting on. Kakashi very nearly kicked Lydia before sitting straight out of bed panting and gripping a dagger. Something like shock was on his face and when he saw Lydia in his peripheral he very nearly threw the dagger at her. Lydia had flinched at the motion and made as quick as attempt to dodge; she then opened her eyes when she didn't feel anything. Kakashi had the dagger gripped in hand but she could see he didn't follow through in his strike. Sunlight flittered in threw the part of the roof that wasn't thatched and cast light onto the bed.

"Sorry, are you okay?" Kakashi asked.

"Yeah, what was that about?"

Kakashi sighed and put the dagger back where it belonged. "Just a nightmare I get from time to time… Hey I'm sorry about last night."

"It's okay, nothing to be sorry about. Where did you go yesterday? I thought you were going to get some sort of surprise."

"Oh-! That, yeah, we just need to go to Warmaiden's next door and get you fitted. I was gone later than expected. I was a bit buzzed- Well maybe a bit more than buzzed. I just was uh-" Kakashi looked uncomfortable and looked to be grappling for something.

"It's okay if you don't trust me, sir." Lydia said offering a sympathetic look.

Lydia could see Kakashi seemed off put by her statement. Still the uneasy look he gave slowly turned gentle, tired and wary. Kakashi glanced away, looking as if in thought. When he seemed ready he looked back to her; he cleared his throat before speaking.

"I occasionally get desperate when I drink. Do you ever get a need to try so hard it launches you in a panic? Like say you misplace something of deep importance. It's natural to panic but this is something I get often when I think about how I got here."

"How did you get here?"

Kakashi sighed in response and the pause between them became quiet and uncomfortable. "Lydia, can I tell you after we eat? It's a long story and requires a lot of context… When I say words like shinobi, hidden village, kunai, those things mean very little in your vocabulary."

Lydia thought over the offer. This was it; she was finally going to know why the man before her was so… broken? Why he was drowning himself nearly every day in sorrow the way her father did? "Yeah, okay. Did you say we need to go to Warmaiden's to get me fitted?"

"Yes, I got you some armor that will suit the way I'm training you. We can head over after we eat. I'm hungry, and so very tired."

Lydia felt like arguing that she didn't need armor. She had her own, but she secretly hoped it was an upgrade. Sure, steel armor was nice but she'd dreamt about having an ebony set since before she could lift a sword. If it was light it wouldn't suit her skills to use it proficiently. Beggars couldn't be choosers, but she never asked Kakashi to get her armor. Lydia had decided it best to make her argument if it did turn out she was being fitted for light armor, for now she wanted to make sure he was okay before cooking breakfast for them.

"How are you feeling?" Lydia asked breaking the silence.

"I'm so tired."

"You keep saying that, why don't you get some rest while I cook? I can come get you when it's done."

"No, that's not what I mean."

Kakashi paused and Lydia waited for him to explain but when no words arrived, she felt awkward. The pause stretched longer than necessary so she felt the need to say something. "What _do_ you mean?"

Kakashi looked to be wrestling with a thought, Lydia wondered if he forgot she was there. Something changed in Kakashi's demeanor. What was a vulnerable man a second ago, turned distant again. Finally his aloof gaze met Lydia sending a shiver of discomfort through her. What had changed so fast?

"Lydia, what were you doing in my room last night?" Kakashi's tone sounded calmly curious enough but something amiss came off about him.

Kakashi's question surprised Lydia a bit, did she overstep a boundary? What was she doing? It did catch her off guard and she felt the need to answer as quickly as possible.

"Uh- Well- uh, see sir I was getting you to bed last night-"

"I get that part and I appreciate it," Kakashi interrupted. "The part I don't get is why did you sleep with me?"

Now Kakashi's demeanor seemed accusatory. There was a tentative pause as Lydia was trying to think of an answer. The air between them felt awkward and uncomfortable. She slept at a strange man's bedside, and it seems she invaded his space. There really was no logical reason for her doing it. She put him to sleep and rather than leaving him afterwards she made herself comfortable. _Why?_ Lydia racked her mind but didn't have an appropriate response.

"I'm not sure my Thane- Kakashi, erm sir. I just um dozed off, I was tired. You were pretty difficult getting into bed sir."

"Tired huh..? Pretty sure the only time I share a bed is for one night stands or if it's my dog. Correct me if your customs are different." Kakashi stated the last bit dryly.

Lydia didn't know at all how to respond and was floored by the statement. It seemed she definitely crossed a boundary. The man with a little more than half his face hidden valued his privacy, go figure. The pause grew longer and more uncomfortably awkward between them before Kakashi finally broke their gaze. He sighed and was focusing his attention on no particular place in the room.

"I'm sorry. I-… That wasn't professional." Were they professional? What were they? Kakashi made it very clear he didn't want Lydia to be his housecarl or he her Thane so what was the nature of their relationship? "Regardless from here on you should respect my space."

"Kakashi, we're partners right?" The pause between them was short but tense before he looked back into her eyes. There was a deep amount of intensity that shone in his visible eye like he was reading through her looking for something. His expression was hard to read as if Kakashi was putting up a wall to keep Lydia out.

"Yeah, we're partners." Kakashi replied with an empty tone. Kakashi looked away, fishing a bottle of mead out of a bedside drawer.

"Kakashi, you really don't need that right now."

"I'm pretty positive that's a choice I can make myself. Right now what I _need_ isn't a whole lot of your business anyway," Kakashi said with a sudden coldness.

Lydia was a bit taken aback by the response. While Kakashi had been annoying from time to time he'd never addressed her with such distance before. It took her a moment to process what he said, before she felt anger. _It was her business._

"It is my business! I just want to help you! I'm tired of going through this, I've seen greater men fall victim to drinking! I just wish you'd let me help you! I pick you off the streets, I feed you, and I just want to help you! Why won't you let me help you?" Lydia bellowed out, her mouth drawn thin and eyebrows lowering. Kakashi appeared to also be a bit surprised but it only took moments for his look to change to something with harshness.

"For someone who cares a lot, you sure don't seem to mind putting your nose where it doesn't belong," Kakashi replied coldly, anger forming in his eye. Lydia's anger faltered; he wasn't wrong. She allowed herself to get tangled into his affairs in an obtrusive way. He likely wouldn't have opened up to her at all this morning if she hadn't slept on his bed.

"I- Kakashi, I just wanted to get to know you. We're strangers." Lydia explained her voice calmer.

"Strangers huh? So then why do you want to help a drunken stranger? I never asked you to be my housecarl. I never asked you to feed me. I never asked you to pick me up out of the street. I never asked for your damn help. I don't need you, I've never needed you. I've never needed anyone. I'd really rather you stop pretending you care, and let me go about choosing how I live my life-!" Kakashi hissed.

"Fine! You know what, you're right! You don't need me! We'll see how much better off you are without me!" Lydia kicked her chair back letting it screech against the wood flooring and stormed from the room. She gathered her armor, her sword, and shield and slammed the front door behind her on her way out. Lydia bitterly hoped the banging sounds hurt Kakashi's likely hung-over head.

Lydia's anger dropped when she noticed their arguing had gotten the attention of town folk who were getting an early start to their day. A few people saw her march out and were whispering amongst themselves. Lydia felt mildly embarrassed, as she knew she was going to be subject of the town gossip today. She could already hear the rumors about her echoing her mind and she felt her anger flare back up.

"What are _you_ looking at-?!" Lydia gritted out between teeth in a low growl. Some people appeared to be taken aback; some were smirking and whispering louder. Lydia just scoffed and stomped off, she really just needed to cool down. She didn't know what she was doing anymore. She headed to the Bannered Mare and got a private room to change back to her armor. She tried to put away thoughts that were nagging at her while getting a meal but nothing would stop them from surfacing.

Lydia does want to help Kakashi, but how should she go about doing it? She tried being stubborn and stern with her father- that clearly didn't work. She tried being comforting, outgoing, and kind with Kakashi- again, it just served to push him away. She was going about it wrong but how? Maybe she was too fast with Kakashi. Maybe she should have been more patient? Kakashi for all his occasional bouts of friendliness was very much slow to trust, if he could ever trust anyway. This was obviously not a problem she was going to solve in one night. Not even Julianos could bless her with the wisdom enough to parse a solution. Maybe she should talk with someone.

Lydia began to head to the only other person in town she felt like talking to. Although she wasn't very close to the Huntress, Aela was the only other woman her age she really knew. She would have formally gone to Proventus with all her problems, the Jarl's steward. Proventus however was usually heavy handed with his advice. Lydia liked Proventus like a sort of adopted uncle but she just wanted to speak with someone her peer.

Lydia headed for Jorrvaskr and used every ounce of courage she had to walk up to the steps leading to Jorrvaskr. She hadn't really seen the inside of Jorrvaskr's halls and even walking up the steps made her feel very out of her element. Lydia was unsure whether to knock or waltz right in. Judging from the largeness of the building she assumed it best to just enter and hope she wasn't met with drawn steel. As soon as Lydia entered, she witnessed a brawl between an elfish man and a nord woman. The gathered people were screaming encouragement or whispering advice. She was not sure that the fighters paid either group any mind.

Lydia almost jumped a few feet when she felt a hand grab her shoulder. Lydia turned to see who was touching her and was happy to see Aela's face smiling back at her.

"Hey there friend, It's good to see you," Aela said.

"Likewise!" Lydia responded pulling Aela into a hug. Aela returned the gesture before pulling back holding the housecarl by the arms.

"What brings you today? You finally come to meet my shield mates?"

"If only it were under better circumstances," Lydia replied her smile faltering a bit.

"Ah, come now, follow me. This isn't really the place to be speaking on such private matters," Aela took Lydia's hand and guided the nord to a room downstairs. Aela closed the door and only the two of them were in the room that had a bed and a bow with a few arrows on a table. Aela pulled out a chair from the table the bow was resting on and motioned Lydia to take a seat. The huntress took a seat on the bed before speaking. "So what brings you here, friend?"

Lydia averted her gaze to her feet unsure where to begin. "I- uh, got into an argument with my Thane."

"Is that all? Lydia, if I had a septim for every housecarl who got into a disagreement with their nobles, well my wealth would rival the High King's."

"No, it's different…" she started.

"Oh my divines! _Lydia,_ are you sleeping with that man?" Lydia's face lit up bright red at such a thought.

"_N-No-! _Of course not!"Aela was smirking, a teasing look on her face. Lydia scoffed and rolled her eyes. "Ugh, why did I come here?"

"Okay, okay, I'll stop. What's the matter? How is it so different?" Aela asked. Lydia sighed before looking back to her friend.

"Well so, we're not really Thane and housecarl. I mean we are but he keeps insisting split pay on things and doesn't expect anything from me. Aside from helping him understand what things are like the divines and stuff about our culture. The other day he beat up that bard Mikael for Carlotta, I wasn't even there to help but he still split the pay. Said I helped him to bed. He keeps insisting I stop being his housecarl."

"Huh- guess he's a bit nicer than I would've expected. So, what's the problem?"

"You remember my father? Well my Thane drinks like him and I just wanted to help. It wasn't a very welcomed gesture, and we got into a kind of argument. I don't want to see him right now. I just really need to blow some steam off."

"Hmm… I see. I don't think this was what Fjoek had in mind for you being housecarl to some noble. But then your old man was always a bit short sighted…" She started, turning back to Lydia. "Apologies for speaking ill of your father. I just never liked the crap he put you through. Lydia, the only advice I can offer you is something my mother always said to me: you can bring a horse to water but you can't force it to drink. Unless you're really good at bribing the damn thing, but I think that last bit was my mother talking crazy."

Lydia and Aela had a good chuckle thinking about some of the things the huntress's mother used to say. Lydia was so happy she was back in Aela's good graces and they talked as if they hadn't stopped seeing each other for so long. It was likely due to the fact the Aela's mother had passed not long ago and Lydia was the only person left from that past. Lydia had sent a letter to Aela when her mother passed wishing her condolences hoping they'd see each other soon. They hadn't though, being both busy pursuing their goals.

"You know if you want to blow some steam, I have a mission you can take. I'm not really supposed to be handing these out to people outside of the Companions but I don't think anyone will miss one quest being handled," Aela offered. "Besides we're up to our eyeballs in requests ever since war broke out."

Lydia thought it over; she could use time out of town. Maybe the rumors about her would have died down by her return. Maybe Kakashi would feel sorry for being such an ass and come looking for her. There didn't seem to be any cons to the offer. "Yeah, I'd love that. I need to get out of town for a bit."

Aela reached over to her bed side drawer and fished a letter out, "The Jarl of Windhelm has asked for our help. It seems that predators have taken up residence and have been attacking farmers and travelers. Someone's got to head out there and take care of the beasts." Aela handed over the letter and Lydia accepted it.

"It's simply a beast, but be cautious. You know the beasts of Skyrim are made of sterner stuff than most," Aela said.

"Thanks, Aela, I'll be back before you know it. I really appreciate it."

"Sure, don't mention it. Just do me a favor and tell no one. When you're finished come back to me and we'll talk privately about your payment. If you want to quit the request before you get there it's not a big deal. My guild is not your undertaking and I don't expect you to do this job."

Lydia nodded and headed out feeling much better than she did coming in. Lydia gathered a few supplies at the general trader and the market before heading out. She stole a final glance to the front door of Breeze home. The door had scuff marks around the keyhole that were noticeable even at a distance but otherwise nothing stood out about the quaint looking home. The scuff marks were likely a product of Kakashi's attempts at getting his keys in when not sober. Lydia sighed and quickly jogged over to the town entrance.

Lydia was thankful she didn't run into Kakashi on her way out of town.

* * *

**A/N: I'm sincerely sorry it has taken me this long to update. I was dealing with some personal issues and while they aren't resolved I'll try not to let them eat up my time too much from writing. I plan on keeping a bimonthly/monthly update schedule but may currently be looking for a beta. I'm also creating a piece of artwork for these last two chapters and am planning on incorporating artwork occasionally with future chapters. **

**As a side note I would prefer addressing any questions as they are asked or within the story itself. Although I'm aware I've left a lot out for interpretation until the future. First things first Kakashi does have reason to be the way he is currently. And I've tried to show a fraction of it in this chapter I recognize it doesn't much do justice for the out of character-ness. Please have patience we will get to what has brought Kakashi to Skyrim. I promise I'll make it worth it.**

**So why Lydia? I really like Skyrim and through thick and thin Lydia has always been one of my favorite followers. Depending on how you play she's often times the first follower you get. I love the mods that give her characterization or when people interpret her personality themselves. And even if she always gives away my sneaking position she will always be one of my favorites. So I've wanted to give her a story of her own. Believe it or not I've never actually read any Elderscrolls fanfiction. So I hope the ideas I've come up for her past and characterization is unique.**

**Finally, This is a Kakashi central fic but since the story is both a crossover and about a forming friendship, I'm going to do Lydia's POV on and off. However, I keep it strict so there is no confusion of what POV it is. It's more challenging and fun to put things strictly in two POV's and to ensure neither get tangled up with the other. **

_**Thank you so much for reading! I hope you've enjoyed this as much as I have writing this. Please be sure to leave a review, something as simple as an anonymous hi really gets my day going. I love and enjoy all feedback. Any questions I will try to answer promptly.**_


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